03/11/2012

untitled


There is a warning about ‘after life’ came into my life again. Two grandfathers passed away in a week. Although, I just followed only one of both funeral preparations – yesterday, I recognized them as my “senior” in my daily life. Honestly, I have no much interaction with them, but I don’t know what kind of a feeling that remain in my deep heart. I just looked at the body which covered by a veil and awared my self that he would not open his eyes again. Something that waked me up, “he has been taken away”.

Before my grandfathers passed away, I had a hard situation. Perhaps, I have some problems and I am not mature enough to overcome my own problems. I just was losing my control toward something that related to my heart. Then, something knocked my heart when I saw the body of my grandfather. When I looked at the body, I thought that someday I will be in his situation. I imagined when I have difficulties in solving lecturer problem, I could try to find any one who want to help me, teach me how to solve the problem by using certain strategy, but… when I imagined about life after die, I never be approached by souls of my family who passed away in order to give me information about “what must to do” or “what must to be left” in life. Immediately, I ‘wake up’ and said to my self, “I have an excessive feeling toward my own feeling. My soul still inside of my body, but I just have little attention on a death preparation. What am I doing during this period time?”